by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 23, 2025 | What readers are saying
I received an advance readers copy of the book. Jean Widner succeeds in capturing the depth and breadth of the history of adoption in America from the late 1800s to the present and yet also manages a deep dive into many specifics of the practice, as well. She offers insights and an incredible array of resources in the process.
The book examines the plusses and minuses of how adoption in America evolved and is currently carried out in its many forms, open, closed, etc. Unlike many other books on the topics she does not omit the voices of adoptees and birth/first parents. To the contrary, she takes great care in presenting all sides of the adoption equation. The perspectives of adoptees, birth/first parents, and adoptive and foster parents are all present and presented in their own words. These passages are especially enlightening.
This book discusses adoption in an objective voice, including an abundance of peer-reviewed, reliable research and data points, but the author also shares from her own experiences related to adoption at certain points along the way. The author also discusses challenges in our foster care and kinship care systems, hurdles for adoptees as they reach adulthood, and sorely needed legislative change in all areas of adoption, foster care, and child welfare in general.
As an added bonus, Jean leaves the reader with lots to ponder and reflect on. This would be an excellent book to read if you are considering adoption or fostering, or a great gift for someone else considering adoption or fostering. It is an instant classic as well as a valuable reference book that should be on the shelf of anyone who calls themselves an “adoption professional.” I highly recommend!
-Marci P
by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 23, 2025 | What readers are saying
I received an advance reader’s copy of Jean Kelly Widner’s, The Adoption Paradox – A remarkable and deeply moving exploration of the multifaceted world of adoption, told with heart, authenticity, and unflinching honesty. As an adoptee herself, Widner brings a unique and personal perspective to this ambitious project, weaving together a tapestry of stories from all sides of the adoption triad—adoptees, adoptive parents, and birthparents. The result is a powerful, thought-provoking book that shines a light on the complexities of adoption while celebrating its capacity for love, resilience, and healing.
What sets The Adoption Paradox apart is its commitment to giving voice to those who are often unheard. Widner’s carefully curated interviews reveal the raw emotions and dual realities that define the adoption experience—joy intertwined with loss, gratitude shadowed by grief, and identity shaped by both connection and separation. Her storytelling is compassionate yet unflinching, allowing readers to see the beauty and the pain that coexist within this paradox. The inclusion of diverse perspectives ensures that no stone is left unturned, making the book a comprehensive and empathetic portrait of adoption worldwide.
Backed by meticulous research, the book doesn’t just tug at the heartstrings—it educates. Widner delves into the historical and cultural contexts of adoption, offering insights that are both enlightening and sobering. Yet, it’s the personal narratives that truly resonate, transforming statistics and theories into living, breathing stories of real people. Whether it’s an adoptee grappling with their sense of self, a birthparent navigating the aftermath of their decision, or an adoptive parent balancing love with uncertainty, each account is handled with care and respect.
Widner’s prose is engaging and accessible, making The Adoption Paradox a book that invites readers from all walks of life to reflect on the deeper truths of family, belonging, and identity. It’s a triumph of storytelling that not only honors the adoption community but also challenges society to rethink how we approach and understand this profoundly human experience. For anyone touched by adoption—or simply seeking a poignant, inspiring read—this book is a must. Jean Kelly Widner has crafted a masterpiece that will linger in your heart and mind long after the final page.
-T. Castaneda
by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 22, 2025 | What readers are saying
I received an advance readers copy of “The Adoption Paradox by Jean Widner. As an ally to many members of the adoption community, I was excited to read Jean‘s book and she did not disappoint. So well researched, poignant, and relevant. Before reading this book, I was one of those rose tinted glasses people that believed adoption was the best option. Now I know better. Jean educated me in the horrors for (a lot, not all) adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, siblings. She taught me about the inconsistencies in the system, particularly when it comes to internationally adopted children and domestically born children of color. There is so much room for improvement, Jean offers options and statistics to support her positions. Thank you for the eye-opener. Well, written should be read by all in the adoption universe, particularly those lawmakers, social workers, lawyers, and judges who are part of or have authority over the adoption process and laws.
-Lori B
by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 22, 2025 | What readers are saying
I received an advanced readers copy of the book.
Get ready to have your eyes and hearts open through reading The Adoption Paradox.
Like so many things in life, it would be way more comfortable to see things in black/white, right/wrong pronouncements. Doing “the right thing” could leave your conscious clear. Life isn’t really that simple though, and neither is adoption. This is a complex topic that deserves our attention.
Jean Kelly Widner does a beautiful job of sharing stories directly from the point of view of the many sides/angles of adoption. She compassionately weaves their stories, while also pointing to the problematic systems in place that cause pain for many.
As a therapist, I have worked with people on all sides of the adoption paradox. Jean does a beautiful job of normalizing the many complex and conflicting emotions and experiences that adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents experience. This is the book I will recommend to clients and others to read to support their own healing journey. I recommend this book to therapists for a more holistic view of all involved. If you are a therapist, you have had clients affected by adoption in some way or another.
Jean is my friend. I had the honor of witnessing her courage and growth as she went through the process of researching and writing this book. What she discovered and shares with all of us changed her. This book will change you too. For the better.
-Julie Kyker, LMFT
by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 21, 2025 | What readers are saying
I received and read an advance reader copy of this book and highly recommend it to anyone touched by the world of adoption or other non-traditional family constellations and dynamics. What an amazing job the author has done, corralling an enormous amount of information, from historical to contemporary, about adoption as a lived experience, as an opportunity for happy families, as a source of dysfunction in families, and as a business (not always ethically conducted). She has skillfully balanced a “facts and figures” book with an interweaving of her own experience and the experiences of those she interviewed, letting vulnerability, honesty, and intimate journeys inform and inspire. Not an easy feat. I learned so much and enjoyed the flow, cadence, and good writing. I hope others will, too!
-Michelle Tullier
by Andres Fragoso Jr. | May 21, 2025 | What readers are saying
I was lucky to get an advance copy of this book. It is a well written book. It’s clear Jean spent so much time and care to write a thoughtful book. The Adoption Paradox travels the range of adoption through extensive research and in depth interviews. Whether you’re an adoptee, birth parent or adoptive family this is a great read. I highly recommend.
-Kate D
